Curiosity is an unlikely super power. For us and our species. It can help to bridge gaps. If we genuinely want to learn from the other, we are not likely to hate the other. We can appreciate the other and make it easier to learn from her or him.
If polarization is a problem, as many of us believe it to be, how can we address that problem? Here are some options Will Braun offered us in our class. Some possible strategies:
- We can yell. Denounce. Cancel. Bash. We can be like the person holding a gun, gazing at the horizon, and as soon as they appear we can shoot them down. This is actually quite common. In what world are these strategies helpful?
- We can argue and reason with the other. But when was the last time an argument from the other side convinced you of anything? When was the last time I convinced someone from the other side of anything? Frankly, I can’t remember any successes. Evidence indicates that failure is common; success almost non-existent. Studies have shown the more facts you give the other side the less likely you are going to persuade them to change their minds. Argument seems futile.
- Use sophisticated jargon. This is very common on the left, though it happens too on the right. The left has their language and analysis and so does the right. The left talks about bias, racism, exploitation and things like that. The right accuses the other of being woke, that is the latest way of dismissing the left. Again, this usually causes the other side to entrench and never come out again.
- Fight like hell. You can try to be strategic, smart, learned, and effective and you end up being none of those things. Another exercise in futility.
- Listen. Now this option has possibilities. Are you not curious about what the other will say and think and do? Curiosity can be a super power. Will Braun did not use this language. It is mine. If you go to the other side and say I want to learn from you. I want to hear what you are saying. For most of us this is very hard. Braun admitted it was hard for him. But something happens when you change to this approach. It really is a superpower. It often takes courage to make the first move to approach the other side with curiosity. As Braun said, “This can turn down the temperature.”
Braun said he has a friend who is a strong Trump supporter and lives in Texas. The two of them though can talk to each other, with the temperature lowered. They disagree with each other, but they do so respectfully because they remain friends. As a result, they are each less likely to demonize each other. Braun said, “Then you hold some tension. If instead you say, screw all those other people I am letting go, then the tension snaps like a rubber band.” It is gone. Then you go to your side and the other goes to her side. Does that create a better society? Braun argues that for the longer term it does not. It does not help the weak and vulnerable. They are not better off.